by Elizabeth Jackel | Thursday, March 26 | Posted in Food

Kansas. The Wheat State. The Sunflower State. The Beer State? It might have been if it weren't for those teetotaling, busybodied, fun-hating killjoys who led the charge toward Prohibition. Kansas as "The Beer State" might be a stretch, but had we not been forced off the road to perdition there's no doubt that, in addition to being closer to eternal damnation, we would be much further along in our brewing history.

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The skinny on your week

by Diviner Mme Zanzibird | Thursday, March 26 | Posted in Amuse
  • Aries: (March 21 — April 19)
    Week rating: F2
    You shouldn't hide that sprocket rocket in your pants.
  • This week: Get in a barbershop war.

  • Taurus: (April 20 — May 20)
    Week rating: F3
    That charcoal sketch of your building manager will earn you $25 off next month's rent.
  • This week: Barbara Walters is on your speed-dial.

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    by Gustavo Arellano | Thursday, March 26 | Posted in Amuse

    Dear Mexican: Why are we put down by our own people for being educated and articulate while the Anglos accept us for being smart? I work in Santa Ana, California, as a high school teacher and am considered very good at what I do, but when I meet with the Mexican parents, it almost borders on mistrust. What is it — envy, paranoia, jealousy?

    — Smart Mexican American Reading Teacher Asking Serious Stuff

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    by Don Winsor | Wednesday, March 25 | Posted in

    Indiana is ready to go full monty with a legalized discrimination plan that failed even in Oklahoma. That's right, our friends to the east saw the executive order made by Gov. Sam Brownback in February, and said "Nope! Not far enough!"

    They decided to push through a measure that would make it legal for you to tell any customers who offend your religious sensibilities that they cannot purchase ammunition, bait, or whatever the hell else it is you sell when you're the sort of person who would do that.

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    Yes, we really asked the mayoral candidates these questions — and they answered.

    by Don Winsor | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in View

    Shortly after the mayoral primary, in which we're sure you voted because you're all intelligent people, we contacted the camps of each of the candidates for mayor going forward. Jeff Longwell and Sam Williams gamely agreed to answer whatever questions we chose to throw at them, and we took full advantage of that. What follows are our questions and the responses; after reading this you will know all you need to in order to make your decision at the ballot box.

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    by Bill Jenkins | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in View

    I'd much rather be talking about Israel or the NCAA regional in Omaha this weekend, but I started to tell about my experiences going to the march on Selma 50 years ago, so I had better finish the job. At the end of last week's article, I had been one of about 40 people arrested marching around the Alabama State Capitol building on March 19, 1965.

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    by Don Winsor | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Food

    As you know, the west side of Wichita is a lawless wasteland where life is cheap and rough justice is dealt by bands of malfunctioning robot cowboy sheriffs who long ago escaped from Wild West World. The minivans of the funmoms in their Lululemon pants roam unchecked and your attempts to reach the IMAX at the Warren on 21st are entirely at your own risk. Until now, IMAX movies and pizzatacos were the only reason to venture west of West; now there is another.

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    by Vickie Kline | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Food

    My front porch is whispering my name. Not outright calling me yet, just whispering and letting me know the time is drawing near. Yes, it won't be long until I'll be spending many evenings there: writing these articles, talking with the neighbors, petting my cats and relaxing with a glass of wine in hand.

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    by Jeremy Webster | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Film

    Chappie is the sort of science fiction film that is able to both exhilarate and frustrate viewers — sometimes doing both at the same time.

    This third feature from District 9 and Elysium director Neill Blomkamp is, like both films before it, concept-heavy from the get go, with Blomkamp exploring the nature of artificial intelligence and, ultimately, consciousness.

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    by Dan Kampling | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Film

    Perhaps the most charming aspects of visiting one of the various Disney theme parks is getting the opportunity to meet the various characters in person. Sure, to an adult it is understood that they're just actors in costumes representing their cartoon incarnations, but the sheer delight of the setting and witnessing the exuberant level of delight on children's faces while they treat them like they're real make Disney live up to its reputation.

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    by CJ Harries | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Music

    It's been almost two years since Harm's Way released the short, five track Blinded. Two long years with 20 minutes on repeat. Two years of '50s dad haircuts from "Mind Control." Two excruciatingly empty years with a few new YouTube hits here and there with washed out audio and beefy, angry hardcore dudes.

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    SPECIAL BEST-OF EDITION

    by Gustavo Arellano | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Amuse

    Dear Mexican: Why do wabs, regardless of age and body size, always have one hand rubbing their bellies under their shirts? Is this something that is inherent in all wabs? Because they all do it, especially the "fresh from the border" ones. I don't get it. I'm a pocho, and I've never seen other pochos do it. Are wabs finger-banging their belly buttons or what? They all look so fucking stupid doing this. Just go to Home Depot and watch them!

    — Pocho with Albóndigas Grandes

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    The skinny on your week

    by Diviner Mme Zanzibird | Thursday, March 19 | Posted in Amuse
  • Aries: (March 21 — April 19)
    Week rating: F2
    If you start soaking the fruit in alcohol now, you will bake the best fruitcakes for Christmas 2015. This week: Set aside a quarter of your fridge for "aging" the cakes.
  • Taurus: (April 20 — May 20)
    Week rating: F3
    Life is weird right now, but you'll make it through. This week: Order a custom-made cake, just for yourself.
  • Gemini: (May 21 — June 21)
    Week rating: F4
  • Read more ...
    by Bill Jenkins | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in View

    All the network coverage of President Obama's speech at the Edmund Pettis Bridge in Selma, Alabama this week, 50 years after the brutal Bloody Sunday there, set my mind spinning back to that period in my life.

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    by Vickie Kline | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in Food

    My husband and I take fall or winter vacations, which can sometimes be challenging but are always interesting. It's become a tradition to spend New Year's Eve at Table Rock Lake, and we also like to visit the Seattle and Oregon coasts during October or November. One year we ended up in Long Island in the fall and had the best time. That time of year brings discounts on flights, hotel rooms and few places are busy. It's a pleasant and unhurried time to become acquainted with an area and visit extensively with locals living there.

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    by Don Winsor | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in View

    St. Patrick's Day is a multifold holiday when we celebrate not only the contributions of persons named Patrick, but those of famous drinkers as well. Some of our most beloved fictional characters celebrate the comical upside of drunkeness — Shakespeare's Falstaff, Victor Borge's stage persona, Dudley Moore's irascible scamp Arthur and, of course, Lindsay Lohan. On St. Patrick's Day, we celebrate them and all those who can manage their drink with aplomb and complete disregard the fact that you may have a very serious problem.

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    by Don Winsor | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in Food

    On last Thursday evening, the Eaton Venue downtown hosted the "Throwdown in Oldtown," an event to raise funds for Children First: CEO Kansas. The event revolved around the judging of cookies and latte art, attracting the area's top competitors in each field. Your favorite coffee joints and bakeries were represented in a sweaty thunderdome of sugar and caffeine, while upstairs bright young girls displayed their talents in a science fair in hopes of winning a scholarship to Space Camp. The place, not the movie.

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    Blade Runner and Wrath of Kahn hit the silver screen this week.

    by Dan Kampling | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in Film

    The summer of 1982 proved to be a milestone in science fiction film history. Not just for the fact that Steven Spielberg's E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial went on to become the highest grossing film of all-time, but 1982 also saw the release of a slew of influential films, whose impact on the genre still carries on over 30 years later. Two of these such films, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and Blade Runner, will be playing here in Wichita on big screens over the next four evenings as the inaugural screenings of Warren Theaters' "Return of the Cults" series.

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    by Torin Andersen | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in Music

    Though it has been a few years since Mac Lethal performed Wichita, there is no love lost for this performer known for his pancake flipping skills as much as his rhyme flipping skills. (In 2011, he released a video on YouTube of himself rapping over the beat of Chris Brown's "Look at Me Now" while he prepares pancakes in his kitchen. This went viral and garnered him interviews on CNN and in The Washington Post.)

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    by Elizabeth Jackel | Thursday, March 12 | Posted in

    This St. Patrick's Day, wear green pants, shoes or socks. Put on a green hat, green glasses, a green scarf and a green wig. Paint your nails green. Slap on some green eyeshadow. Wave a green flag. But whatever you do, please don't drink green beer. The "wearing o' the green" has deep, historical roots in Irish nationalism. The drinking o' the green … less 18th century patriotism, more mid-century collegiate fraternalism. Putting green food coloring in a light American macro beer makes it no more Irish than putting a tiara on a turkey makes it the Queen of England.

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