¡Ask a Mexican!
Dear Mexican: From what I've seen and heard, Mexicans are very family-oriented. They take the names of their mothers and fathers, live with extended family, take carpooling to the nth degree and tattoo the names of their children across their bodies. We recently had a party and invited one of our Hispanic friends. She showed up with her grandmother, mother, sister and her two kids! What the hell was that all about?
What I don't understand is this: Whenever I see Mexican men and women walking along busy streets, or through stores, or standing at the bus stops, their little kids are usually more than an arm's length away, sometimes trailing as much as several feet behind them. It's also not uncommon to see little kids crawling around in front seats, back seats and beds of trucks, totally unrestrained! I'm quite sure these are the same people that put the "In memory of..." on the back windows of their vehicles when their kids die from wandering into traffic or an auto accident. Maybe there is some sort of perverse logic that I don't understand. Perhaps those decals on the back windows are more highly respected by the Mexican community than raising good, healthy, honest kids. What are your thoughts?
Dear Gabacho: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's 2013 study "Motor Vehicle Traffic-Related Pedestrian Deaths — United States, 2001—2010" broke down pedestrian death rates for children 1-14 by ethnicity. Findings showed while more niños were involved in fatalities than gabachos, the rate isn't too far off — 1.66 deaths per 100,000 population for gabas compared to 2.61 for Latinos. On the other hand, rates in the same age group for girls favored Latinas — 0.62, compared to 0.68 for gabachitas. Do gabacho parents not care for their little girls, assuming their sons are going to marry Mexican chicas calientes anyways? Unlike your pendejo ass, the study determined factors other than race skewed death rates a certain way. (The most-killed pedestrians statistically? Chinitos 75 and older.) Your assumptions just make an ass out of you and tu, but perhaps you respect babadas more than good, healthy, honest facts?
Why do Mexicans love to watch American movies with Mexican voices dubbed over the actors when they speak their lines? I find this very irritating. What is this fascination? When Americans watch foreign films, the language is left intact, with only subtitles added at the bottom. There is nothing more amusing than watching Arnold Schwarzenegger speak Spanish.
Dear Confused Gabacho: In the early days of sound, Hollywood productions would film multiple takes in multiple languages to appeal to their fans worldwide. Moviemakers knew even then that foreign audiences like hearing dialogue in their native language, even if said in a phonetically hilarious tone ala Laurel and Hardy, or dubbed completely to ludicrous results (you think Ah-nuld is funny? You gotta here "Homero" on the Latin American broadcast of The Simpsons). Nowadays, only the biggest foreign films or television shows get dubbed in Mexico, taking into account that children and the poor might not yet have the reading comprehension to understand subtitles. Besides, you've never seen The Lion King until you hear it dubbed in Spanish, the way my family did with a piratería copy again and again and again.
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